South By Key West

This past week, I took a much needed vacation. I know that everyone thinks my job is so easy because all I do is sit on my duff, tossing out olde tyme phrases, making references to old movies and TV shows that only I remember, and hanging up on strangers like Ernestine.

How Listeners Imagine Me At Work

But there is more to my job. First of all, you try being interesting for four solid hours. As I have proven repeatedly, that is impossible. Plus, how would you feel if every day you went to work and random strangers came up to you and called you fat or ugly or untalented and then you had to turn around and try to be hilarious? No wonder I need a Bloody Mary for breakfast. And so off to Key West I went.